YouTuber KwakTube opens up about past school violence trauma

Travel YouTuber Kwak Jun-bin revealed on the EBS program 'Blank' that he was unable to leave his house for four months following death threats from former bullies. During the interview, he shared how his initial desire for revenge through success eventually transformed into gratitude.

Travel YouTuber KwakTube (real name Kwak Jun-bin) has confessed to a past where he was unable to leave his house for a long time following threats from school violence perpetrators who bullied him. The bullying, which lasted from the sixth grade of elementary school through high school, did not end simply because he left school. Haunted by threats that they would "find him and kill him," he was unable to go outside for approximately four months, and the memories of the past hindered him even while he was preparing for the high school equivalency exam. KwakTube shares the wounds he had hidden, detailing how his desire to get back at his attackers through success eventually transformed into gratitude and a drive toward a new life.

In the EBS interview content 'Blank' scheduled for release on the 13th, Kwak Jun-bin sits down with Lee Yu-won, a 19-year-old who dropped out of school, to reflect on their respective times. Having experienced similar pain but living through different eras, the two engage in a sincere conversation using question cards with blanks, covering everything from memories of the day they left school to the experiences that shaped who they are today. The dialogue gains meaning as a conversation between a youth pushed outside the boundaries of school and an adult who has already passed through that period.

The first question was "the first thought you had on the day you left school." Kwak Jun-bin wrote the word "liberation," while Lee Yu-won answered, "the golden time of my life that was stolen." Although both stood in the same space outside of school, their emotions differed. Lee Yu-won revealed that she suffered from repeated violence, even experiencing incidents where energy drinks were poured over her head. She also shared the reality of finding it difficult to resolve issues within the school system, exposing the institutional and psychological isolation faced by victims of school violence.

Listening to the story, Kwak Jun-bin could not hide his astonishment at how similar the situation was to the bullying he experienced 20 years ago. He recalled being exposed to school violence for a long period from the sixth grade of elementary school through high school, yet he was unable to even inform his parents of the victimization. The experience of having to endure the pain of his childhood alone did not end after he left school. He was gripped by the fear that the perpetrators could find him and harm him, and he was actually unable to leave his house for about four months due to threats stating they would "find him and kill him."

Daily life after dropping out was also not smooth. Kwak Jun-bin enrolled in an academy to prepare for the high school equivalency exam, but seeing the students sitting in the classroom reminded him of the perpetrators who bullied him in the past. Rather than adapting to a new environment, the academy space itself became a place that revived his past fears. Consequently, he quit the academy after only fifteen days, though he did take the equivalency exam and received an average score of 86. Lee Yu-won also shared her experience of passing the exam with an average score of 96 through self-study, demonstrating the persistent will to survive and become independent between the two.

The factors that helped them endure the difficult times were different. Lee Yu-won endured the painful period by listening to music by Bach, while Kwak Jun-bin endured each day by holding onto his dream of going abroad and his interest in soccer. For the two, who could not enjoy a safe daily life within the school, music, dreams, and interests were more than mere hobbies; they were psychological shelters that supported their collapsed lives and exits that allowed them to imagine the future.

The atmosphere of the conversation shifts with the question, "what moved me so that I could start again." Lee Yu-won wrote "diary," and Kwak Jun-bin wrote "revenge." Lee Yu-won tells the story of how she faced her emotions and changed through the process of recording her pain while reading the diary she wrote herself. For Kwak Jun-bin, the desire to be more successful than the people who bullied him was the driving force that led him to start new challenges. The intense emotion of wanting to prove his existence to those who hurt him acted as the momentum that pushed his life forward.

Kwak Jun-bin explains in detail how his desire for revenge transformed, recalling the moment he received a rookie award in broadcasting. At that time, he even considered directly mentioning the names of the four people who bullied him during his acceptance speech. He wanted to publicly reveal the anger that had remained in his heart for a long time. However, when he actually stood on stage and held the microphone, the people who came to mind first were not those who had hurt him, but those who had supported and helped him until now. The heart that wanted to get back at the perpetrators through success had, before he knew it, changed into gratitude toward the people around him.

A scene follows where he supports Lee Yu-won's new start. Lee Yu-won, who has challenged various auditions with the dream of becoming a singer, sings directly for Kwak Jun-bin. While praising her singing skills, Kwak Jun-bin points out that her voice trembled due to nervousness. He then shares his own experience with job interviews and advises her not to be frustrated by results and to continue challenging herself. It is a scene where a person who once had to doubt his own potential due to school violence now offers the courage to challenge herself to a youth experiencing similar wounds.

KwakTube married a civil servant five years his junior last year and started a family after welcoming a son this past March. It is notable that he, who experienced isolation and fear due to school violence in the past, is now living a new life as a husband and father of a family. This conversation shows how long school violence victimization can encroach upon an individual's life even after leaving school, while also reminding that the way to overcome wounds does not necessarily have to be forgiveness or forgetting. Kwak Jun-bin's process of moving from a desire for revenge toward success to gratitude and support is expected to deliver a heavy resonance to those still fighting the memories of school violence.

Meanwhile, KwakTube's past stance of appearing to defend actress Naeun, who was subject to school violence allegations, is being brought up.

Read the original (Korean)