“I don't want to be a bird in a cage” SNU Med student and SKKU Engineering couple split

A couple that repeatedly faced conflicts regarding the girlfriend's social relationships from the early stages of their dating has finally chosen to break up. While the cast of 'Love War,' including Seo Jang-hoon, advised prioritizing the recovery of one's own life through separation rather than maintaining the relationship, the two also decided to part ways after reflecting on their issues through the broadcast.

In the 10th episode of JTBC's 'Love War,' which aired on the 31st of last month, the couple Lee Seong-jun and Kim Ye-rim, who were on their 40th day of dating, appeared. Lee was introduced as a doctoral student at Seoul National University College of Medicine, and Kim introduced herself with the nickname 'Shin Se Kyung of Sungkyunkwan University Engineering.'

The core conflict between the two was the issue of Kim's male friends. Due to the nature of the engineering college, which has a high ratio of male students, Kim had interacted with various male friends during her university life, but Lee perceived this as a factor that could threaten their romantic relationship.

The conflict grew even larger following Kim's trip to Mongolia with her student council friends. Lee expressed discomfort regarding her mentioning a male friend on SNS during the trip, and as they revealed a tense confrontation with another male friend they happened to encounter at the gym, the conflict between the two expanded beyond simple jealousy into an issue of control over human relationships and trust.

Lee claimed that there were many so-called 'fake male friends' around Kim. On the other hand, Kim appealed that she was gradually losing her true self as her boyfriend intervened excessively in her social life.

Kim also explained that there was an age gap between her and her peers because she entered university after five attempts. She implied that her social relationships formed during university life hold significant meaning to her, and the psychological burden grew as she repeatedly had to give them up one by one due to the relationship.

The conflict also spread to the issue of attending the Waterbomb Festival. When Kim brought up the Waterbomb Festival, Lee again mentioned the Mongolia trip and the male friend issue. As their argument grew long, Seo Jang-hoon eventually spoke bluntly, saying, "Please, just break up."

Seo pointed out to Lee, asking, "Why are you being like this to your girlfriend?", noting that his tendency to lose his temper and react sensitively could feel threatening to his partner. He further diagnosed that excessive suspicion and anxiety were ultimately suffocating both his life and his relationship, saying, "It feels like being trapped in a dark room you created yourself."

When Kim said she wanted to meet a man with a broad heart like Lee Sang Soon, Seo replied even more firmly, "Then break up." He meant that there is no need to continue a relationship by unilaterally imposing one's standards on a partner who does not match one's personality.

Lee Hyo-ri also told Lee, "Seong-jun, you are like a thornbird." She pointed out that he not only applies high standards to himself but also demands those same standards from his partner. Lee advised, "You can live a little more freely," suggesting there is no need to view going to the Waterbomb Festival as something strange.

Choi Daniel emphasized the need for an attitude that focuses on the partner rather than one's own emotions in a relationship. He suggested that a mature relationship is possible only when one acknowledges different parts of each other rather than trying to mold the partner to fit one's own standards. Kim Ji-eun also shared her experience that even if one lives trying not to make mistakes or cause trouble to others, people actually do not pay as much attention to you as you might think.

Ultimately, the two decided to break up together for the first time in the program's history. Kim stated her reason for the breakup, saying, "I don't want to live as a bird in a cage anymore." It was a decision that she could no longer live as herself in a relationship that excessively limits her social life and lifestyle to maintain the romance.

Lee also reflected on his attitude. He stated that through the broadcast footage, he realized his mistakes and decided that breaking up was the right thing to do, even if it was for Kim's sake.

This case serves as an example of where the boundary between jealousy and trust lies in a relationship. When interest and consideration for a partner turn into control that limits the partner's social life and actions, the intimacy of the relationship can actually be damaged. Especially since the two, whose dating period was only 40 days, organized their relationship in a way that allows them to maintain their own lives rather than trying to resolve the conflict, it shows that 'ending a relationship healthily' can be just as important as 'sustaining love.'