Jang Yoon Jeong: 'If you're going to die, die with me'

“If you're going to die, you should die with me. Are you going to leave me and die alone?”

These are the words singer Jang Yoon Jeong poured out as she recalled the moment her father attempted to give up on life. The grueling times her family endured, hidden behind the glamour of the stage and success, have been revealed. The story of a father who drove to Seoul every night to save his young daughter, and the daughter who later held onto her collapsed father by telling him, "I only have you," is less a tale of one-sided sacrifice and more a record of a father and daughter who became each other's reason for survival.

In a video titled 'Living as Jang Yoon Jeong's Father,' released on her YouTube channel 'Janggongjang Jang Yoon Jeong' on the 24th, Jang looked back on the past while having a meal with her father, Jang Dong Su, ahead of the Chuseok holiday. In particular, the two spoke for the first time in detail about the period of greatest economic hardship and the father's contemplation of suicide at that time.

Jang, who moved to Seoul alone to pursue her dream of becoming a singer, once suffered from such severe financial hardship that she could not even afford to pay the gas bill. Upon learning of his daughter's situation—unable to afford heating—Jang Dong Su drove to Seoul every night. Inside the car with the heater on, the daughter leaned against the passenger seat while the father leaned against the driver's seat to sleep. He would repeat a cycle of leaving for work in the morning and returning to find his daughter at night.

While that time was a simple 'memory of paternal love' for the daughter, the father was also standing on the edge of a cliff. Recalling those days, Jang Dong Su confessed that he went to the Seohae Bridge twice, intending to give up on life. He wanted to escape because he could not endure the economic pressure, but the thought that Jang Yoon Jeong would have to bear the remaining debts and reality after his disappearance held him back.

One memory, in particular, remained intense for the father: a day when it was snowing heavily. He said that after stopping the car on the Seohae Bridge, he felt as if his daughter was calling him from somewhere. Although she was not actually there, the thought "Yoon Jeong is alone" crossed his mind, and he eventually turned the car around. It was the moment a person contemplating suicide returned to daily life.

When Jang later learned of this fact, her reaction was not tears, but anger. She recalled that she "cursed at my father," saying to him at the time, "Are you not going to pull yourself together?" She continued, saying she demanded, "If you're going to die, you should die with me. Are you going to leave me and die?" This was because, to a young daughter, her father's death was not just a loss, but the collapse of her own life.

The two eventually cried through the night while holding onto each other. During the era when the father spent nights in the car for his daughter, the daughter was essentially demanding that her father not let go of the thread of life. It is a scene that shows the essence of their relationship was not 'who supported whom,' but a relationship where they became each other's pillars of support.

As time passed, the roles reversed. This time, Jang had to hold onto her father's life. One day, during a phone call, she sensed that her father's pronunciation was unusual, and in the process of checking again, she noticed abnormal signs. Ultimately, her father was found collapsed and received treatment at a hospital.

However, even in the hospital, the father repeatedly said things to the effect of, "I am no longer of any help to you, so it is right that I just die." To this, Jang replied, "Then who am I supposed to live with? I only have you." When the father tried to let go of the meaning of life because he thought he had nothing left to do for her, the daughter told him that his very existence was the reason.

Recalling those words, Jang Dong Su said, "I only have her. She only has me, and I only have her." Jang Yoon Jeong said, "Dad, I'm going to live, so you live too," and the father replied, "Okay, I understand." He later revealed that he has begun rehabilitation training to move his body again.

The fluctuations in Jang Yoon Jeong's family history are not being revealed for the first time. In the past, through broadcasts, she has shared times when her family history was greatly shaken by her parents' divorce and economic issues. During her parents' divorce lawsuit in 2013, it was revealed that while Jang had entrusted her income earned from singing for 10 years to her parents to manage, she discovered during the process of checking her financial status that there was almost no balance and significant debt, which brought the family conflict to public attention.

At that time, the use of funds was disputed among family members, leading to public conflict. In July of that same year, the divorce lawsuit was concluded through mediation, and an agreement was reached regarding property issues. Jang's side explained that her parents had been discussing divorce for a long time and that economic issues were not the sole cause of the separation.

The story Jang Yoon Jeong shared now is different from the past family disputes. It is not about conflict over money and success, but a memory of a father staying up all night in a car for his daughter during extreme poverty, and a daughter later holding onto her father when he wanted to give up on life.

The family history of a successful star is often consumed through sensational frames of wealth, conflict, and reconciliation. However, what stands out in this confession is a much more primal form of relationship: two people who would have collapsed without leaning on each other eventually using each other's existence as their reason to keep living.

To Jang, her father was the man who drove to Seoul every night to keep her warm during her years of poverty; to her father, Jang Yoon Jeong was the person who made him turn his car around at the moment he considered ending his life. While the roles of protector and dependent have reversed over time, the essence of their relationship remains unchanged. The story of Jang Yoon Jeong and her father shows that family can sometimes be the most powerful language of survival, transcending mere bloodlines.